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« Mama Troubles. | Main | Seasonale. »
Thank You.
December 1, 2003
First of all, thanks so much to everyone who responded to my previous mama freakout. There were so many good, solid suggestions interspersed with a great deal of encouragement...and I appreciate all of it.
After I wrote that post, I went to lay down with Coley, and I realized that I was feeling kind of stiff and achy and dizzy. Very dizzy. And sweaty. I was sick! I spent the rest of the day lying in agony on bed, alternating between feeling freezing freaking cold and way too hot. And I realized that I have been sick with one thing or other for pretty much the entire week. As have the kids. And they haven't really been out much and all that entails. So there is an element of cabin fever going on here that might explain why I'm feeling so short-tempered and nasty - not that it's an excuse, but it's good to figure out there are contributing factors and not just arbitrary rage.
So I spent the ENTIRE afternoon/night in bed. I watched way too much television. I snuggled with the kids while they were in the bed with me, and Monk was kind enough to play with Coley pretty much the whole time while I was resting. I was very thankful for that, and there weren't any of the little screaming arguments that frequently occur when they play together, which was extra nice.
I still have a horrible headache, but I think I'm going to feel a lot better in the morning. I didn't barf, which is a Really Good Thing because I'm a total wimp about barfing. Monk was disappointed, though - because barfing is his new favorite bodily function.
We're coming up on the change of seasons, and it's time to re-evaluate the rhythm anyway. Coley is inconsistent about his reaction to morning circle. There are days when he will participate fully the entire time. There are days when he will quietly go off and play by himself. There are days like today that 15 minutes into the story-time he will kick and fuss and make a scene. I have to also give him credit for being a little sick himself. And, being the youngest, I'm sure it's frustrating to have to comply with what Monk wants to do all of the time.
Anyway, I better go back to bed. Looking around my house is depressing me - it's such a mess. I'm relying on L to take the boys to the playground tomorrow when he gets here so I can clean, and he said he would, but he so very rarely keeps his word about such things. And then he so very rarely acknowledges that he has lied or broken a promise. I don't want to set myself up for disappointment. I might try to find someone to take my kids tomorrow afternoon if I'm feeling better so I can just get some work done then. If I'm not feeling better, I just hope that he does take them to the playground so I can get some more rest. The kids were very patient with me today. I managed to make dinner for them and avoid power struggles, but they got very little of my attention. They will need me to pay attention to them tomorrow, and I'm hoping I have the energy.
Oh...while laying in bed, I happened to watch Fox News last night (I don't have a remote, so the TV tends to just stay on one channel when I'm feeling pitiful). Holy fuck, you know? I know it's cliche to make fun of the imbalanced reporting on Fox News...and I know I've done it before...but gah! Here are some things I was pissed off about:
- Gleeful reporting about the 50 or so Iraqi soldiers who were killed in yesterday's firefight, and practically no mention of our dead and wounded. Secondary mention of the North Korean, Spanish, Japanese, and Colombian civilians and soldiers who had died. Almost casual mention - and quickly followed by reassurance that the Spanish and Japanese governement is committed to remaining in Iraq.
- A story about acid reflux and esophageal cancer which showed pictures of fat people eating too much and walking around with their fat bellies...and then an interview with the very thin man who actually HAD the illness. The man who had the illness was treated very sympathetically during the interview (which was a good thing) but the images of fat people pigging out were shot in the usual shaming method of "Look at how disgusting we are as a nation, and this illness is our punishment."
- This one took the cake: In the middle of reporting on actual news, they did a piece on how much money George W. Bush has been able to raise, and how much more web presence he has than Howard Dean. And, basically, how much more likely he was to win because he has so much in his "war chest" and will be able to "do battle on multiple fonts." What is with the war analogies when reporting about the presidential election? Isn't that just a wee bit offensive, considering we are actually fighting a war here? And the clip they showed as they were talking about how much money he has raised thus far was one in which Bush was smiling that smug smile that makes me want to slap him. Does it make anyone else really fucking sick that these people - any candidate, really - are able to raise so much money to run for office as our public servants while there are people who don't have enough to eat and don't have health insurance for their kids? What the fuck is up with that? Where does all of this money come from? Why is it less important to feed and care for people than it is to run for freaking political office?
Agh. Anyway...back to bed with me. I just needed to let that out before crawling back between the covers.
Thanks again for all of the support.
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Comments
I hate that you're feeling sick. There's a lot of that going around here. It's great that the boys are picking up on the "Mama needs some quiet and nurturing" thing, though. I hope you're feeling better soon.
The last thing you need. Hope you feel much better soon.
Laura