DruBlood
Home
Dramatis Personae
Archives
Contact
Feed the Bleed
Amazon wish list
Cole’s birthday - 10/24
Monk’s birthday - 12/2
Dru’s birthday - 1/5
Search
Archives
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
April 2004
March 2004
February 2004
January 2004
December 2003
November 2003
October 2003
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
June 2003
May 2003
April 2003
March 2003
July 2002
June 2002
May 2002
Special thanks
adam host
julie template queen
kd general lusciousness
pea guru
Powered byMovable Type 1.5
« My environmentalist rant of the day | Main | Fight for your right to dry »
There comes a time when you just say "Fuck it."
August 28, 2007
Life is too short to take any one thing too seriously...and life is too short to not take things seriously at all. It's when I finally reach this point that I can just relax and enjoy what all is going on in all areas...and hope those around me can relax and enjoy things, too. Most of the shit I am worrying about, I have no control over, anyway, so why not just do what I can and relax and enjoy all the stuff that is right?
I called my mom yesterday to tell her about all of the driving and finagling I was having to do to get through my work day these days, and how it makes my work day span 12-16 hours sometimes just in the getting children to various places they need to be so I can go to meetings and trainings and just my every day job. I was feeling like I was acting like a weenie wimp because I ACTUALLY was hoping I would catch the flu that landed my ex in the hospital because, fuck, at least then I would get some rest. She laughed. She knows how it goes. My friends with kids know how it goes. Sometimes you get so caught up in that struggle, you forget what it is that you are struggling for.
Today, I looked up at that sky, and it was just right. And the birds are starting to gather for one of my favorite times of year. The kids were cracking me up and being cute, and I was remembering the magic of the lunar eclipse last night and feeling tired for having woken up at 4 AM to see it, but feeling so totally stoked that Coley loved it so much. And Monk was all grouchy, and I had been letting it get to me all day, and then it hit me that the reason he was being grouchy was because he didn't get enough sleep. Monk so frequently acts like an old man that I found myself being suddenly delighted that things like not getting enough sleep can make him lose control of his temper and act like a...well, like a child.
I finally had a chance to sit down and visit with two of my favorite mamas who I don't get to visit with nearly enough what with the major changes in schedule we have all endured. And it was nice to listen to how they have negotiated their differences and come out stronger...and it was nice to share my chaotic maelstrom of a life with them knowing that rather than worrying about me, they would reflect on the conversation later and smile about the fact that we are all living our lives in a way that makes us completely happy somehow, regardless of how different it is. Those differences, and that acceptance anchor me somehow. They make my life feel all the more chaotic and/but all the more wonderful for the fact that people who love me can appreciate my appreciation of it.
And on the way home from our friends' house, I told the children stories about road trips I had taken with their dad, and with them. And Monk remembered that one of the themes of a road trip we took when he was 4 and cole was 1 was "Cole eats dirt in all 50 states" because every time I would put that child down he would instantly insert a fistful of whatever the ground was made of and shove it in his mouth.
I asked the kids where they wanted to go for our field trip this week and Cole said "Japan!" and then "Mississippi" and I smiled, realizing that they get restless, too, knowing there is a wider world out there that they haven't yet explored...or even places they have explored that they miss and want to return to.
And I am thinking about those clouds and those birds and those children and those friends and all of those miles of road and life that snake and spider between and around and within it all, and I'm actually feeling pretty good. Summer is always hard. Things ease up in autumn. Everything will be ok. You are always loved. Everything will always be ok. Forever and forever and forever.
Trackback Pings
TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://mt.riceweevil.com/tb/17700
Comments
Yep, life is too short. Great post, i really enjoyed this one.
Hi there... just as I was looking up any entries concerning 63 Eyes, there comes your blog... brilliant posts...
I'll be popping around if you don't mind...
Oh, and if there is a chance to get any 63 Eyes music from you, I'll be glad to exchange "look in for mothmen" with any music you like...
Keep Up the GW
Nada
what a great post.